January 23, 2008

Cool Day

Okay. Today is the last day before we get our O lvl result. Everyone is afraid and me too. Today started off as a very fine day. Lessons, normal. Lectures, boring. Tutorial, sucks. HAHA.

Anyway, i just ended my training and is now back at home. =)

Anyway, today, i realli wanted to see my frens more and realli more =)

I am so scared that they changed sch or i have to change. I realli wanted to see them. No matter how pretty (lying is a way of life in NJ, hahaha. kidding) Anyway, i took photo with some of the people and i realli wanted to keep that memory well inside me.

Today i emo again. I was just thinking that i shld be changing since i am no longer in cat high already. But i did it again. I have to admit that i like to emo alot and those who noe me well will noe that i am realli am emo kid. Maybe i am like eve's fren (from her description)

Anyway, the reason i emo today was because ppl that i already considered my best frens and leaving me behind. They had their sweet chat and doing homework and leaving me alone. I realli hate to be alone. Maybe it is because i have experience loneliness too many times. I need someone to accompany. Be it a girl or a guy. I want to always be talking. Maybe i am just afraid that one day, i will be lonely again. I dun want to experience that again. I realli want to be noticed and cared for. I want people to love me as who i am. I noe that this dun sound like a guy talking but little things like talking to me more makes me feel so much better and so much more like me. I realli nid that someone. Be it a one or two or even a clique. I just dun want to be left out. So i was quite sad today. During GP, i totally didnt talk (much lar) and back at Bio lab, i totally just emo until miss ling decided to play some stupid game which made me want to realli say the truth out (about who i hate most in the class, there is of coz 1 girl that i realli dun like, maybe to the extent of hate)

Anyway, i realli want to confess something but it seems like impossible. Furthermore, i am not even sure of what i am thinking right now. Maybe today is not a cool day afterall. So many things just makes me ponder. I wonder so many things when no one talks to me and i will always go to the worst case scenerio. I hope that someone will always keep m busy and thinking abt her.

Anyway, i am thankful that i have got such a wonderful class. I hope to stay and see the rest of them for the rest of the 2 years (other than someone/sometwo). If not, i hope to see the whole class around.

Anyway, i am going to have PE tmr. What makes this lesson sweet is that i am pratically have some physical thing everyday. I had training on monday and today and PE on tues and tmr. Die arh. My muscle is actually aching. But still trying my best to show that i am okay. haha.

Anyway, time to go. Tired liao. Nights

~LoN3Ly M3~

No comments: