Long time no post

It has been quite long since i last posted. A lot of things had happened and some of which are definitely not happy ones. I don't know how to look at all these problems already. I think i'm just running away from them but i don't think that makes any difference even if i do care about it.

Anyway, council term is coming to an end. I don't know what i will feel or what i'm feeling now. It's just so weird to not be working closely with them again.

Anyway, i know it's time to start mugging. But i just dun seem to be able to settle myself down to study. Why? Can someone help me?

RAH!!!

~JuSt M3~

Emo

Hmm, i think many of you want to know the reason. I think. Maybe none of you are interested at all. Nvm, i wanna rant anyway, so just fuck off if you're not interested at all. I'm not forcing you to read anyway.

1) I am trying my best to balance my work and relationship and there you go again. I see you with 'him' again. It is during election day itself. Don't you have duty too? Even if you don't, isn't it suppose to be your duty to try to get the class to listen and vote intelligently? And there you go again, doing god knows what. I was simply trying to have a good lunch with her and there goes a call and there goes the perfect lunch. How do you think i feel when i walk past the class and see them mugging and see you with 'him'? Maybe it's just me again, but this time, i really don't care who's at fault. You're outta my concern already. I don't care what you do anymore. I'm trying to accept. But here i am, trying to fucking balance everything. Just fuck off.

2) I feel extremely terrible when boss went out along to get the notebook for me. I was back in school at 5+. Even bang went to get the things with him in the end. I feel super bad.

3) Fucking academics. Why is it that everything seems so much harder now? Why the fuck are the lecturers so boring? It is almost every lessons that i fall asleep. I even have a hard time to stay awake during tutorial. Fuck this shit.

4) Even teachers have problem with me now. That is at least what i think.

5) just many other minor stuffs.

Darling, i'm sorry that i can't spend more time with you. I promise i will find the time right after the camp. Sorry. I'll have time de. I'm not that busy.

~EmO M3~

Home

What the bloody hell is that? I don't know why but the hatred to go home is like worse off now. Maybe boarding is really a good idea. Why do we always have to fight? And why cant you keep the house like it is a house. A simple big bag of stuffs can also be gone. Where the hell did it go? I'm damn bloody pissed!

Boarding

Hmm. I'm staying in NJ boarding school now until may. I may not really be updating or be online as much. Sorry

~JuSt M3~

Lost

Council

A word that was placed before everything. Why is it so blur now?
What is the purpose of me in it now?
I don't know anymore.
Friends? Leadership? The experience?

I don't know how to see it now. Is it me that loses the focus? Or you?

I don't know why but that word seem like a stranger to me now. It doesn't give me the passion or love that i used to have.

But then again. What am i without council?

~EmO M3~

IMU

~JuSt M3~

Sian

I'm going to feel sian for this week. SIAN!!!

~LoN3Ly M3~

Today's feeling

There's something fishy about today's Pisces New Moon and it has your name all over it. Individualism isn't one of your strong points, for you'd rather swim with a school than have to venture off on your own. Nevertheless, you could still be feeling a little stand-offish now, making forward movement harder. Instead of waiting to see how everyone else responds, just express what you are feeling, even if you then go off to spend some time by yourself.

Okay, today i felt so left out of the class. I don't know why. I just felt left out. And seriously, please stop all the actions in class. Yes, the class know by now but it's still quite disturbing. It's not like there's no one in the class. Maybe you don't feel it, but it's quite gross to other people.

I don't know how to express this also, but it's just weird and f up.

~v3XeD M3~

Oops

Sorry for not updating for so long. Had been busy. Hmm. Very busy actually.

Anyway, i still got lots of work to catch up. Sorry. Update next time.

~BuSy M3~

Gosh

Cool, many things happened. But this is what i hate:

YOU

I don't know how to see you now. I mean it. I just don't seem to understand you now.

~JuSt M3~

Seriously

I seriously don't know how to look at you now. You're so restricted i would say. I don't know if you think of it this way. But it's just.... NVM. Do what you like. This is what you desire (may not be completely you. But i don't want to make things hard for you)

I'll do what should be the best way. STAY AWAY FROM YOU and yes. I've really got nothing else to say now.

~SaD M3~

Nice Quote

The heart is willing... but the wallet is weak

Hahas. found this off the internet. Hmm. Quite true for most people in love bah. I believe i dun have to be in love oso like that liao.XD

Hmm, anyway, today went to guan yin miao to pray. Hope that this year will be a smooth year for me. It's my Alvl year and i dun want to screw it. I will work hard. For myself and my motivation =)

Prayed for some other people too. Hope that they can get the same blessing too. =)

~JuSt M3~

CNY

Okay, today went to letts house to play and at the same time, do work?!?!?!

Hahas, yes, you didnt see it wrongly =)

Nothing much to say coz we played and played? Hahas...

~JuSt M3~

Disappointment

Today is such a disappointing day. I hope that you do reflect on your own action if you read this. Maybe i'm wrong but you really changed to a person that i never thought i knew.

Anyway, as a good friend, i urge you to think about it. I really don't hope that you will turn to someone that get so detached from people just because of someone else.

The thing is that I don't understand why you have to leave. You should understand what i'm saying. Anw, i have realli nothing else to say now. You just changed so much, to a person that i no longer understand.

~DiSaPpOiNtEd M3~

WooHoo

Okay, first of all, i need to say sorry for not updating this blog for so looooooooooooooooong

The thing is that i'm super busy over many things over this few weeks and i tried finding time to post but then to no avail. So i'm posting now. And hope that i can update more often.

Okay, so from my last post till now, it has been like 16 days. So i will go through each day slowly =)

1st Jan
So i was not at home for the whole day until night because i had celebration over the year and at the same time, went out to look for campfire things. That is roughly it, i cant rmb the details alr too. XD

2nd Jan
Had a trial campfire on this day and the thing is that i dun realli like the idea. So i quarreled with someone and decided not to talk at all. I don't understand how she thinks sometimes.

3rd Jan
The day started with me going to school early in the morning to meet up with the council retreat comm and finalise some things. It went pretty okay. And then, we talked. It was like the first time we talked since so long. I meant talking as in trashing things out and not the normal kind of talking lar. It was quite good since i knew why she was angry at me. I didnt spill everything since i thot everything is alright alr.

4th Jan
So this day is a free day (not exactly thou). I was at home resting and taking a break from the long hours of not being at home and lack of sleep. So i was thinking what i shld bring for council retreat and so, i decided to not pack yet. hahas.

5th Jan
So the day started off with me packing my things into my bag for council retreat and getting to school super early just to get my ass on the bus to go to malaysia. Why do i sound angry? Coz i was too early. Sian, waited for so long. Ok, so the bus ride took freaking long (but it's okay, coz the lunch we had is superb. i just realised how much i can eat too. XD) and then when we got to the hotel, we put our things down and the rest had free activity time. Why the rest? Coz council retreat comm had some things to plan and do. So i went to recce for a good location for council bonding activities. Thou the place was not the ideal place, but i guess it was the best we could find in the hotel. =) So we played some games and bond as a council. I hoped that everyone enjoyed it but i certainly did =) Then night came and we had some reflection session. I heard a lot of things and also shared a lot of things. I realli think it's then, that i felt that, yes, i'm so attached to council. Not the council exactly, but lots of councillors. I know i cant live without them now.

6th Jan
Hmm, so the day started with me not wanting to wake up early. Hahas. Then we had sharing session and then some fun then went on with BBQ night =). It wasnt really BBQ coz we just take the food the hotel prepared for us. Hahas. And i loved the council party. It rocks. I was the host and i kaa jiao many ppl. XD







7th Jan
Back to SINGAPORE =)

I'm going to cut short from here. =)

8th Jan - 11th Jan
Tanking work, sai kang. Stay over. Yes, that's about all.

12th Jan - 16th Jan
Orientation <3

~JuSt M3~

Last Day of 2008/ First Day of 2009

Okay. SO the day started bad on 31 Dec 2008. Then i was super reluctant to go out oso. Until bang call me and asked me go. Then i soft again and went out. Was fun. Didnt realli regret. Anw, some things that i wanna say.

2008
1) It is the most fun year i had so far. I hope that next year will be a lot better.
2) There are some people that i really need to talk to
3) There are many stupid things i did.
4) I dont like your attitude now. I think you should be doing the same to me too if you request me to do it.
5) Was out the whole nigh

2009
1) have a great year
2) A level rocks (being sarcastic)
3) Dont do so much sai gang.

~SlEePy M3~